12.27.2017
I DON’T HAVE EUROPEAN TRAVEL MASTERED.
EVEN THOUGH I GET UP AT THE CRACK OF DAWN AND CATCH THE FIRST TRAIN,
IT SEEMS LIKE I’M ALWAYS LATE!
WHAT A PICKLE… SOONER OR LATER I WILL GET THIS RIGHT.
I’M SURE I OVERREACT… EVER SINCE MY ATTACK- I STRESS OUT EASILY.
(I WAS ATTACKED BACK IN 2016- AND HAVE PTSD SINCE. IF YOU'RE REALLY CURIOUS YOU CAN READ ALL THE GORY DETAILS HERE)
OK- I FINALLY GOT MY BEARINGS.. I’M ON THE CORRECT TRAIN. IT’S A LOCAL TRAIN, AS OPPOSED TO THE GLAMOROUS BULLET TRAIN I TOOK TO VENEZIA
A FEW DAYS AGO. WHAT A WORLD OF DIFFERENCE TRAVELING WITH COMMUTERS. THE TRAIN IS ABSOLUTELY PACKED .
THERE IS NO LIVING CONDUCTOR TO ASK QUESTIONS.
I DO FIGURE THRU MUILT-LANGUAGE ANNOUNCEMENTS I AM ON THE RIGHT TRAIN GOING THE RIGHT WAY. I HAVE A GOOD AMOUNT OF TIME TO MAKE MY FLIGHT.
I REALLY DO LOVE TRAIN TRAVEL… ONCE I GET USED TO EUROTRAVEL,
I KNOW I WILL ALWAYS BE GOING EVERYWHERE.
THE LOCAL TRAIN IS LIKE A BUS. PACKED, NO ROOM, MULTI-RACIAL.
I MAKE IT TO DOWNTOWN MILANO IN NO TIME AT ALL. NOW I AM CONFUSED.
THE BOARD IS SHOWING SO MANY CONNECTIONS AT SO MANY TIMES,
I’M NOT COMPREHENDING. I SEE A LIVING CONDUCTOR AND RUN OVER TO HIM, “PREGO! WHERE DO I CATCH THE TRAIN- AEROPORTO DI MALPENSA?”
“TRACK ONE,” HE REPLIES GRUFFLY.
“OH REALLY? I PLEAD, THE BOARD SAYS A DIFFERENT TERMINAL?"
“YOU WANT TO GO TO THE AIRPORT, YES? TRACK #ONE.” HE REPEATS.
I DEFINITLY TAKE HIS WORD FOR IT, SO I WALK A GREAT DISTANCE TO TRACK #ONE. IT IS THE LAST OR FIRST TRACK IN THE CAVERNOUS STATION.
I AM THE ONLY ONE THERE. I’M A LITTLE NERVOUS.
FINALLY THIS CUTE ASIAN BOY STANDS NEXT TO ME.
“PREGO, PER FAVORE DOES THIS TRAIN GO TO AEROPORTO DI MALPENSA?”
HE LOOKS AT MY TICKET. “YES IT DOES.” HE KINDLY RESPONDS.
“WHERE ARE YOU FROM?” HE ASKS..
“LOS ANGELES,” I REPLY. HE IS IMPRESSED.
“WHERE ARE YOU FROM? I ASK IN RETURN.
“I’M FILIPINO, HE REPLIES, I WORK AT A RESTAURANT NEAR AEROPORTO DI MALPENSA”
"OK,” I SAY.
THE TRAIN ARRIVES LIKE IN A EUROPEAN MOVIE. TONS OF PEOPLE EXIT THE TRAIN, BUT THE FILIPINO BOY STAYS BY MY SIDE AND POLITELY SAYS,
“THIS IS YOUR TRAIN, PLEASE BOARD.”
I’M AT MALPENSA INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT.
SINCE ANNA HAD TO REBOOK MY RETURN FLIGHT I AM NOW ON EMIRATES AIRLINES.
I LOVE THE STEWARDESS’S “COSTUMES.” I TELL THEM SO.
THEY SEEM PLEASED AND SMILE.
I HAVE HOURS BEFORE MY FLIGHT, SO EXCHANGE MY CURRENCY.
THE DOLLAR IS WORTH NOTHING THESE DAYS, THANKS TO TRUMPWORLD.
I HAVE A CUPPA TEA AND JUST CHILL OUT.
EVERYBODY GOES THRU DOUBLE SECURITY… WE FINALLY BOARD THE PLANE.
THE FLIGHT IS LONG, BUT COMFORTABLE. I AM SHARING THE SEATS NEXT TO ME WITH THIS RICH, (I CAN TELL) ITALIAN FAMILY. I HAVE THE ASLE SEAT AS I’D REQUESTED. THE MATRIARCH IS NOT PLEASED ABOUT THIS AND CHECKS HER BOARDING PASSES OVER AND OVER.
TRY TO CHALLENGE MY TICKET MADAME.. JUST TRY. I DARE YOU.
SHE CAN SEE MY UNCARING LOOK MEANS BUSINESS, SO SHE DECIDES TO JUST GO WITH THE FLOW.
AFTER AN ETERNITY WE ARE LANDING IN JFK.
I AM NOT SO EXCITED ABOUT AIRTRAVEL IN THE 21ST CENTURY.
SINCE 911, ITS BECOME REAL DRUDGERY TO FLY. THE TSA TREATS EVERYBODY
LIKE TERRORISTS WHICH MAKES EVERYTHING TAKE THREE TIMES AS LONG.
CUSTOMER SERVICE HAS GONE OUT THE WINDOW.
MY IMMEDIATE IMPRESSION UPON ENTERING AN AMERICAN AIRPORT AFTER BEING IN ITALY FOR OVER TWO WEEKS -
AMERICANS ARE ANGRY. THERE ARE NUMEROUS ALTERCATIONS, RUDENESS, AND JUST PLAIN MEAN BEHAVIOR. IT DOESN’T TAKE A PSYCHOLOGIST TO SEE THE STARK DIFFERENCE BETWEEN AMERICAN AND EUROPEAN LIFE.
MY CONNECTING FLIGHT IS JETBLUE. APPARENTLY THEY ARE AN ARM OF EMIRATES, OR THE OTHER WAY AROUND. I KNOW FROM PAST EXPERIENCE JETBLUE IS LIKE THE GREYHOUND BUS WITH WINGS… BAD.
I KNEW I’D ENCOUNTER PROBLEMS, BUT THIS IS THE ONLY AIRLINE ANNA OFFERED ME.
I AM NOW IN AMERICAN CUSTOMS.. RIDICULOUSLY LONG LINES, WITH LITTLE HELP OR EXPLANATIONS FROM EMPLOYEES. THEY ALL LOOK AND ACT LIKE THEY’RE BORED WITH THEIR JOBS. I’M DIRECTED, (MEANING A LADY POINTS) TO A FLATSCREEN WHERE THEY WANT YOU TO SCAN YOUR PASSPORT
AND ANSWER TRUE OR FALSE QUESTIONS-
ARE YOU A TERRORIST?
DO YOU HAVE A BOMB?
I GUESS I’M DOING IT WRONG BECAUSE THE AGENT COMES TO ME AND SAYS, “YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG,” SHE RELUCTANTLY DOES IT FOR ME. JUST LIKE AUTOMATED CHECK OUT AT THE SUPERMARKET. THEY GET ANNOYED WHEN YOU DON’T KNOW ALL THE FOOD CODES AND NEED HELP. MY STOCK REPLY IS,
“YOU WORK HERE. I DO NOT. IF YOU WANNA PAY ME $15 PER HOUR I WILL LEARN.”
I’M FORCED TO TAKE A SELFIE PHOTO. I LOOK HIDEOUS!
OLD AS THE HILLS- TRIPLE CHINS.. YUCK!
FINALLY I’M TALKING TO A CUSTOMS AGENT WHO LOOKS LIKE A YOUNG, FASCIST IN HIS UNIFORM. HE’S SUPPOSED TO BE INTIMIDATING, BUT I FIND HIM TO BE A DOLL.
“HALLO, I SAY ALL EFFERVESCENT, PLEASE DON’T HOLD THIS INSTANT PHOTO AGAINST ME.
“YOU DON’T LOOK BAD, HE RESPONDS.
“WHERE DID YOU TRAVEL? HE ASKS.
MILANO, BRESCIA, VENEZIA, AND THEN BACK TO BRESCIA.. OH AND SALO!"
I SAY WITH PRIDE.
“HOW LONG WERE YOU IN ITALY?” HE ASKS.
“THREE WEEKS," I RESPOND INCORRECTLY.. I’M VERY TIRED.
“WHAT WAS YOUR REASON FOR TRAVEL?” HE ASKS.
“I WAS PART OF A GALLERY EXHIBITION IN MILANO. ACTUALLY IT WAS THE MUSEUM, “ I RESPOND.
“WELCOME HOME” HE SAYS.
WOW! I WILL HAVE TO REMEMBER THIS RESPONSE.. WORKS LIKE A CHARM..
MAYBE NEXT TIME I WON’T HAVE TO TAKE OFF MY SHOES?
NOBODY AT JETBLUE COUNTER CAN GIVE ME INFO..
THEY ARE ALL YOUNG AND DUMB AS BRICKS.. AND I AM NOT BEING UNKIND.
EVEN THOUGH I HAVE A BOARDING PASS, THEY TELL ME I NEED A NEW ONE.
I ASK WHY AND THEY CAN’T ANSWER. I FINALLY PLOW MY WAY THRU WITH AUTHORITY, AND I’M NOW AT JETBLUE TERMINAL WHERE THE YOUNG, PRETTY BUT CLUELESS, CLERK TELLS ME SHE NEEDS TO REASSIGN MY SEAT. I ASK FOR AN AISLE SEAT. I THANK HER AND RUN TO STARBUCKS TO GET A CUPPA TEA.
I HAVE A COUPON! FROM MY LANDLORD NO LESS.
A NEWLY ARRIVED ITALIAN FAMILY IS TRYING TO ORDER EXPRESSOS FROM STARBUCKS. THE STARBUCKS EMPLOYEE LOOKS AT THEM LIKE THEY HAVE THREE EYES. I FEEL SORRY FOR THEM. THEY SHOULD’VE JUST STAYED IN ITALY AND VACATIONED IN TORINO.
MY FLIGHT HAS BEEN DELAYED THREE HOURS. WE ARE ALSO INFORMED THRU LOUD CRACKLY SPEAKERS THAT JETBLUE HAD TO CHANGE PLANES, BECAUSE THE FIRST PLANE WAS BROKEN SO THIS ONE WILL BE BETTER, BUT UNFORTUNATELY HAS NO WIFI OR TV.. ON A 5 HOUR FLIGHT…. WHAT ARE THESE MILLENNIALS GOING TO DO WITH THEMSELVES? THEY MAY HAVE TO INTERACT. THE LOUD SPEAKER SUGGESTS PEOPLE DOWNLOAD A BOOK TO READ.
SINCE I’M OLD I HAVE AN ACTUAL BOOK.
NARROW ROOMS BY JAMES PURDY. WE’RE READING IN MY BOOK CLUB @ TOM OF FINLAND HOUSE. BTW- I DIDN’T LIKE THE BOOK. POINTLESSLY VIOLENT WITH ANNOYINGLY, OUTDATED INTERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA.
SO, I’M ON THE LONG FLIGHT TO LOS ANGELES, READING ME BOOK. UNEVENTFUL.
12.28.2017- VERY EARLY MORNING
I ARRIVE TO LAX AT 3AM. IVE BEEN TRAVELING FOR 20 HOURS STRAIGHT!
I FEEL LIKE OVER COOKED SPAGHETTI.
HUMM.. HOW WILL I GET HOME?
THE SUBWAY STOPPED RUNNING AT 2AM. I’M NOT SURE WHERE TO CATCH A BUS.
I DON’T SEE A SUPER-SHUTTLE, AND I’M TOO OLD TO FIGURE OUT LYFT APP.
THIS LONGISH HAIR, GANGY KINDA GUY SAYS TO ME,
“ DO YOU NEED A RIDE SIR?”
HOW MUCH? I ASK ALL DREARY.
$40 PLUS TAXES, HE REPLIES.
I’M SO TIRED SO I SAY “OK.”
“HERE, LET ME TAKE YOUR LUGGAGE,” HE SAYS EAGERLY.
WE WALK OUT OF THE BAGGAGE CLAIM CROSS THE STREET TO THE PARKING LOT.
“WHERE ARE WE GOING?, I ASK
“TO MY VEHICLE. WE’RE REQUIRED TO PARK THERE.” HE SAYS.
“ CAN I SEE YOUR BUSINESS CARD?” I ASK. HE SHOWS ME.
I’M BEING OVERLY CAUTIOUS.THE LAST THING I NEED IS TO BE MUGGED AFTER MY DREAM TRIP.
HIS NAME IS ROGER LUGO. HIS SUV IS NICE. HAS ALL THE LUXURIES-
BOTTLED WATER, MUSIC IF YOU WANT IT. GPS.
HE’S THRILLED TO HAVE A CUSTOMER.
“ I HOPE YOU WILL BE PLEASED WITH MY SERVICE,” HE SAYS.
WE GET ON THE 10 FWY SOUTH AND HAVE IT ALL TO OURSELVES.
WOW- THIS IS KINDA AMAZING. TO BE IN LOS ANGELES AND HAVE AN ENTIRE FREEWAY EMPTY! THIS JUST DOESN’T HAPPEN. SO WE ARE BOOKING DOWN THE HIGHWAY. SUDDENLY THERE IS A TRAFFIC JAM. “I’M GOING TO GET OFF TO AVOID THIS, HE SAYS. IN MY EXHAUSTED PARANOID MIND, I THINK THIS IS A PLOT TO BEAT ME UP AND ROB ME. I WANT TO EXPLAIN DEAR READERS, THESE ARE THE THOUGHTS THAT GOES THRU ONE’S MIND WHO’S SUFFERING FROM PTSD.
(POST-TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER)
I WAS NEVER THIS NEUROTIC BEFORE MY ATTACK.
MY PTSD ALSO FLARES UP WHEN I TRAVEL.
SO NOW WERE ZOOMING DOWN HAWTHORNE BOULEVARD OR SOME SKETCHY STREET IN A NOT SO GREAT PART OF TOWN. ROGER AND I ARE CHATTING.
WE’RE BOTH IN A REALLY GOOD MOOD. UP AHEAD I SEE A BLACK MAN WEARING ALL BLACK WALKING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DIMLY LIT STREET. HE IS ACTUALLY WALKING THE SAME DIRECTION WE'RE DRIVING. LIKE HE THINKS HE’S A CAR.
IN A CALM VOICE I SAY, “WATCH OUT FOR THAT GUY IN THE ROAD". …
ROGER SWERVES AND SLAMS ON THE BRAKES, MISSING THE PEDESTRIAN, WHO THINKS HE’S A CAR, BY INCHES. I REALIZE HE DIDN’T SEE HIM AT ALL.
“OHMYGOD! ROGER SHOUTS, YOU SAVED THAT GUYS LIFE!"
ROGER GETS ALL RELIGIOUS ON ME.
“THAT IS A SIGN, THIS IS A SIGN. I DIDN’T SEE HIM. IF YOU WERE NOT IN THIS CAR TO WARN ME, I WOULD’VE KILLED SOMEONE TONIGHT! YOU SAVE MY LIFE AND YOU SAVED HIS LIFE. YOU ARE A HERO! IT’S AN OMEN."
ROGER BECOMES MY BEST FRIEND. I AM DEFINITELY BACK IN LA.
IN THE DARKNESS OF EARLY MORNING, ROGER GETS TO MY LITTLE APARTMENT IN EAST HOLLYWOOD AND HELPS ME WITH MY LUGGAGE.
“DUDE, I TELL HIM, I AM SPENT.”
WE SAY OUR GOOD-BYES AND WISH EACH OTHER HAPPY NEW YEAR.
I HAVE DECIDED FOR 2018 I WILL BE A HERO.
THE END OF 2017: A DIARY BY RICK CASTRO- COPYRIGHT- RICK CASTRO- 1/2018
